Monday, October 16, 2006

"You're such a Mom!"

Those were almost the first words my friend S. said to me when I stepped onto her (and her boyfriend's) 82 foot mega-yacht.

S. and I have known each other for nearly 20 years. We worked together when we were both in our mid-twenties to mid -thirties at a non-profit student exchange organization. I made most of my "best" friends there - and those years were some of the best - and wildest- of my life. We went out nearly every night, flirted our butts off, felt totally full of ourselves and generally had a great time. (Of course you DO know I'm leaving out the bits about 1) having no money living in NYC working at a non-profit; 2) Being hung over every other day; 3) waiting, waiting, waiting, pining and waiting for that guy to call...; and dealing with the 4) But why DIDN'T he call?!?! -- RIght? You know that? This is only about the good parts of that part of my life. Don't ruin it by bringing up reality, ok?!?)

S. met her current boyfriend about 8 or so years ago, and moved away. We haven't seen each other in about 4, and in that time I've done birthed two babies, graduated from graduate school, and ended a marriage. She, on the other hand, has been flying the globe in her boyfriend's private plane, going on amazing trips, and living in this new mega-yacht for about 6 months out of each year.

I wish there was some way to describe this ship to truly do it justice- all wood and granite, three floors (did I mention there's a captain, first mate and stewardess!) three bedrooms (master and two guest) kitchen, living room.... you get the picture. So, so, so beautiful...

But, when I got on the boat & she saw my necklace (It's of two kids, kinda holding hands, I guess) that's when she made the comment -- and honestly I wasn't really sure how to respond. "Yes, I am" I guess would have been the most appropriate... but - the awe of the boat, being helped on by a captain and first mate, the whole.... amazingdreamlikesplendor of the whole thing (ok, that came on later, when we were on our third bottle of wine - but still!)

And I wasn't upset about the comment, although it's obviously stuck in my mind... I miss my friend a lot - even more after spending time with her the other night. And maybe seeing how her life is mostly made up of cruising, cocktail parties, and museums.... well - just made me realize how much of her life I don't understand and how much of mine she doesn't, either. (Which could also be because neither of us has had a good chunk of time to talk to each other in such a long time! Cruising an Momming - the biggest time suckers!)

And not that there's anything wrong with that - because actually our lives were vastly different before -- and I don't really know that there's a point to this post, except for me to kind of get these thoughts out...

But I think I also kinda realized that even though I might be pretty jealous of parts of her life (especially the walk in closet with the chest of drawers inside!) I think we're both really well suited for where we are. She is totally suited for this lifestyle - can handle it without becoming overwhelmed... and I -- well, really - if I wasn't "such a mom" would I ever even WEAR such a cheesy necklace?!?

(Don't answer. Rhetorical.)