Yep. Sometimes they do. Actually, most of the time they probably actually really truly do. Work out. So, let me tell you what worked out - and no, it wasn't me. Although I probably did more running this weekend than I"ve done in a long while...
As any of you who have read my other blog know - X did not have the kids this past weekend like he was supposed to. BUT, did I let him get to me NO! I didn't! (Ok, a little wee bit...) I just decided that he doesn't want them, then fine - I'll just work with it. The kids are still asking when they're going to go over his place... and my best answer is the 29th - because that's when. Honestly, I don't know what to say. I just don't.
So, J. came over Friday night, and stayed for the weekend. It was sooo great. So great. He came after the kids were asleep & so surprised them in the morning! Then, he bought them a baseball bat & whiffle balls & we all went to play baseball... The kids are so comfortable with him, and it's obvious that they enjoy spending time with him... and the sad thing is, he'll probably be spending more time with them this month than their Dad...
I know you all really really want me to go into excrutiating detail about the day,or about the weekend, but suffice it to say... we just all hung out, relaxed, and played. It was so wonderful. So great. So comfortable, normal, fun, relaxing... just made me feel so good.
And I've been trying for the past hour or so to figure out the right words to describe this. Because of course I just can't take things as they are... I have to think about them... but also this has all been so overwhelming to me.... To feel so loved - for who I am; to love so much - such a wondeful person, to really feel a part of a team... not alone.... Maybe those are all the words I need.
1 week ago