Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Ok, so....

You know, this time I think I'm not even going to TRY to upload photos. Nope. Not going to even try. And maybe the Blogger ghosts will be reading this & say "Ok, so she's not going to try, so next time we'll trick her & let her upload photos... because she's not trying this time." Ya' think? (Don't answer!)

So, let's see. Had an amazing, amazing, amazing weekend away with the kids. I had such a bad week before... busy, bad X experiences. (And oh, did I mention that X got fired. Yep. Fired. Probably an unjust firing - because a bad husband but a damn good employee. The thing is, with him, money is his security & if he doesn't feel secure, it gets taken out on me. I'm just hoping his new girlfriend will pick up the slack!)

Saw EX for lunch on THursday (was it Thursday? THe week is such a blur) and it was pretty non-eventful. I was so busy & distracted & again I'm left wondering how a friendship can continue if we don't talk about what's important in our lives - kids and relationships. Sure, we talk about kids -- but... But again: Whatever.

So, I was stressed about packing. How much? How do I carry? What will the weather be like?! Oh, so very stressed. I ended up using the backpack that went through Europe with me about 20 years ago (can that be? Pretend you didn't read that. Not really that long ago!) and a regular knapsack. So ok, didn't bring extra shoes that was a bit problematic in the rain... but the kids were troopers.

This is getting awfully rambly & for those of you who have made it this far - I commend you.

So - It was just so great to see my kids in a different environment. To hear Max say "Mom, I'll take Nathan to the bathroom." Or hear Nathan say: "LOok, I'm learning to swim!" But the best, and most heartwarming part for me was the idea that I'm creating memories for them. I worry so much that I'm not giving them enough. So many of their friends have already been to Disney, go to plush summer camps, etc, etc. And while I try to anchor myself in reality -- that they're ONLY 4 and 6... still. I want them to have it all.

So, while they were doing these different things: archery, swimming, walking in the woods, making s'mores, even the Jewish communal experience -- and I made a point of teling them that all the kids there had parents that live in different houses. Like theirs. So that was good. I know this sounds extreme, but I could feel them growing. Expanding. I could just see all the experiences building in them.

And that just so filled my heart.

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